Folks, it is with great pleasure that we announce to you that… the king is back. Michael Bay, he of fast cars, babes, misanthropic humor, gory violence, and just a general heap of politically incorrect goofballery, has a new film, entitled Ambulance, hitting in a few months. Somehow, this two-and-a-half-minute trailer that Universal dropped earlier on Thursday has already caused our blood pressure to skyrocket and our tongues to swell, our mouths clogged up like we’re enjoying a peanut butter sandwich — with no milk — and we happen to know the answer to the trivia question on the radio. We should probably call an ambulance, honestly, but we don’t know if we have the energy after watching this absolute monster of a preview. It’s a situation, and we’re not quite sure if we should just pass on now or persevere so that we can recover in time to get absolutely wrecked by this motherfucker in theaters. Anyway, the trailer.
Peep it:
Here’s a synopsis that, somehow, is causing us to sweat profusely:
“In this breakneck thriller from director-producer Michael Bay, decorated veteran Will Sharp (Emmy winner Yahya Abdul-Mateen II, ‘Candyman,’ ‘The Matrix Resurrections’), desperate for money to cover his wife’s medical bills, asks for help from the one person he knows he shouldn’t — his adoptive brother Danny (Oscar nominee Jake Gyllenhaal, ‘Zodiac,’ ‘Spider-Man: Far From Home’). A charismatic career criminal, Danny instead offers him a score: the biggest bank heist in Los Angeles history: $32 million. With his wife’s survival on the line, Will can’t say no. But when their getaway goes spectacularly wrong, the desperate brothers hijack an ambulance with a wounded cop clinging to life and ace EMT Cam Thompson (Eiza González, ‘Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw,’ ‘Baby Driver’) onboard. In a high-speed pursuit that never stops, Will and Danny must evade a massive, city-wide law enforcement response, keep their hostages alive, and somehow try not to kill each other, all while executing the most insane escape L.A. has ever seen.”
Ambulance crashes into theaters on February 18.