fbpx

For A Crappier Milky Way: Here’s a White House petition to rename Uranus as ‘Diarrhea Planet’


The Obama Administration sure has a lot going on these days, but one important matter has finally been raised via White House petition: The goal is to replace the name of Uranus with something more fitting, like Diarrhea Planet.

The petition, launched on April 11, has only 177 signatures so far. The goal is 100,000 signatures by May 11, and if the Nashville rock band truly gets behind the cause, it may gain some traction.

Here’s the petition description:

Rename the planet Uranus to Diarrhea Planet

One young group of American men is singlehandedly saving American rock and roll and creating good American jobs in the process. Those men call themselves Diarrhea Planet, and they are the embodiment of hope and change in Obama’s America.

In thanks to the amazing work that these young Americans are doing, and to inspire millions of other young Americans to strive to the same great heights of guitar shredding and job creation, WE THE PEOPLE propose that the planet Uranus be renamed DIARRHEA PLANET.

I mean, Uranus is kinda halfway to Diarrhea Planet anyway, right? So let’s honor America and let any aliens out there know what we really stand for. Diarrhea. And American jobs.

Sign it. For America, and the galaxy.