Well, you know what, it’s time to face facts: Even though we weren’t the biggest fans of Sonic the Hedgehog when it came out, it seems the world just couldn’t get enough of that little chili-dog loving rodent. For a whole lot of folks, it was the last good experience they had in theater before COVID fucked everything up, and for others, it was a mid-quarantine distraction from just how shitty the world was becoming. So, hats off, Sonic, you earned the right to make a sequel to rake in that dough and probably disappoint everyone who liked the first one. It’s called, of course, Sonic the Hedgehog 2, and Paramount dropped the trailer on Thursday night at The Game Awards, an award show that exists for three reasons. First, it’s meant to reward the most beloved games of the year. Second, it’s meant to pimp out new releases for 2022 (including some films). Third, it generates pure and unadulterated cringe. Anyhow, the trailer. It looks like more Sonic.
Peep it:
Here’s a synopsis, with a full cast list thrown in for good measure:
“The world’s favorite blue hedgehog is back for a next-level adventure in ‘Sonic the Hedgehog 2’. After settling in Green Hills, Sonic is eager to prove he has what it takes to be a true hero. His test comes when Dr. Robotnik returns, this time with a new partner, Knuckles, in search for an emerald that has the power to destroy civilizations. Sonic teams up with his own sidekick, Tails, and together they embark on a globe-trotting journey to find the emerald before it falls into the wrong hands. From the filmmakers behind ‘The Fast and the Furious’ and ‘Deadpool,’ ‘Sonic the Hedgehog 2’ stars James Marsden, Ben Schwartz as the voice of Sonic, Tika Sumpter, Natasha Rothwell, Adam Pally, and Jim Carrey returning, alongside new additions Shemar Moore, with Idris Elba as the voice of Knuckles, and Colleen O’Shaughnessey as the voice of Tails.”
Sonic the Hedgehog 2 hits theaters on April 8. Who knows if it’ll have as bizarrely long of a shelf life as its predecessor but, then again, nobody really knows anything anymore. The only certainty is that they should have kept the original Sonic design.