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The ‘Five Nights at Freddy’s’ teaser will get you to upchuck your cheese

Five Nights at Freddy's
Universal

In retrospect, after getting a Nicolas Cage-led ripoff in the form of Willy’s Wonderland, it was only a matter of time before the horror-game sensation Five Nights at Freddy’s made its way to the screen. If you have had tween-aged children between, say, 2014 to the present, you’re probably aware of this very goofy gaming franchise, and if you don’t, well, you might have seen streamers freaking out at its many jump-scares. What we weren’t expecting was that Blumhouse and the Jim Henson Company would be teaming up to bring the world of the game to life, and if anything’s gotten us excited about this very brief teaser (which leaked online a few days ago and caused a stir) that Universal dropped on Tuesday night, it’s the animatronic VFX that the latter’s bringing to the table here.

Peep it:

Here’s a synopsis, just in case you haven’t spent a good portion of your waking life watching a streamer pretend to shit their pants for Twitch subs or donations:

Can you survive five nights? The terrifying horror game phenomenon becomes a blood-chilling cinematic event, as Blumhouse — the producer of ‘M3GAN,’ ‘The Black Phone’ and ‘The Invisible Man’ — brings ‘Five Nights at Freddy’s’ to the big screen. The film follows a troubled security guard as he begins working at Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza. While spending his first night on the job, he realizes the night shift at Freddy’s won’t be so easy to make it through.”

Five Nights at Freddy’s will jump-scare its way into theaters on October 27. Oh, and because Universal refuses to stop shooting itself in the foot in the hopes that they’ll be able to sell Peacock subscriptions, it’ll be streaming on that service on the same day. Then again, you’ll probably be able to stream your reactions to the movie on Twitch (just make sure to, you know, not show any of the actual movie on-stream because you’ll get a copyright-related ban), which we’re pretty sure is exactly how God intended this movie to be watched.