After getting pummeled by fans over the fact that the decidedly not-Italian Chris Pratt was cast in a role that is somewhat defined by its thick-and-goofy Italian accent and also getting punted about the schedule like a helium-inflated soccer ball, we now finally have our first look at The Super Mario Bros. Movie. Nintendo held a big panel at New York Comic-Con on Thursday centered around their work with Illumination Entertainment over the last few years, and provided lots of little details about what exact kind of chaos they’re looking to inflict upon us. Now, as we’ve said before, we don’t hate Minions, and think that Illumination’s approach to slapstick goofiness is at least a little more ethically straightforward compared to their competitors at Disney. Still, we’re just gonna say that it is weird as hell to hear Mario sound like Andy from Parks and Rec. At least it’s colorful.
Check it out:
And if inquiring minds really want to turn their brains into jelly, here’s the full 45-minute Nintendo Direct that the company put out to accompany their NYCC panel on Thursday:
Here’s a synopsis:
“Brooklyn plumbers Mario and Luigi get the shock of their lives when they discover a parallel world populated by the intelligent descendants of dinosaurs. It seems they weren’t destroyed by a meteor millions of years ago but hurled into another dimension and, now, they have plans to rule our world. It’s up to our unlikely heroes to battle the evil King Koopa and his Goomba guards, free the beautiful Princess Daisy and save mankind in this adventure of a lifetime.”
Aw, shit, wrong Mario Bros. movie. Our apologies to Bob Hoskins. Turns out there’s not really a synopsis one can write up for a Mario picture that isn’t just a long-ass cast list, so here’s Miyamoto himself, God-Emperor of Nintendo, explaining his hopes and dreams for the film via Business Wire:
“What kind of movie should ‘Super Mario Bros.’ be? “We have been working for a very long time with Chris of Illumination thinking about this question. We are now able to have everyone get a peek at the film. With not just the story itself, but through the characters’ look, their emotions, various gestures, we have built a ‘Super Mario‘ world using the language of film. Please enjoy the unique Mushroom Kingdom experience spread widely on the theater screen. Also keep an eye out for the characters, and memories from Nintendo games sprinkled in small parts of the screen throughout the film. The release is just around the corner, and we are in the fine tuning phase finalizing all the details, just as we do with a Nintendo game. It is a film for all ages to enjoy, and I ask everyone to please cheer for Mario at the theaters.”
You yourself can cheer for Mario at the theaters when The Super Mario Bros. Movie hits theaters on April 7, 2023. It’s honestly pretty nuts that Japan won’t be getting to see this until some 20 days after it hits theaters on these shores, but I guess them’s the breaks.