Who’s ready for some fucking content on this Monday morning? We’re really ready for some fucking content, you fucking fucks. Better put your head between your legs and kiss your fucking ass goodbye because the new trailer for fucking Deadpool and Wolverine is here, and it’s got lots of fucks to give. Seriously, they made fucking Kevin Feige on stage at Cinemacon last week and somehow got the Mouse’s most valiant soldier to say “Fuck” a bunch, so you better fucking bet we’re going to go along with this trailer’s fucking red-band theme.
Jesus Christ. We’re thinking it’s probably time to retire that word at this point, but we’re sure that anything we invent will just sound like a Ryan Reynolds ad-lib, and there’s nothing we’d want less than to have that be our legacy.
Peep it:
Here’s the closest thing that we could find to an official synopsis online that wasn’t just a pithy one-liner (and yeah, it’s from Wikipedia, but hey, it’s probably legit, right?):
“The Time Variance Authority (TVA), a bureaucratic organization that exists outside of time and space and monitors the timeline, pulls Wade Wilson/Deadpool from his quiet life and set him on a mission that will change the history of the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) alongside Wolverine.”
Well, guess all this means we finally have to watch Loki. Time to dust off the Disney+ subscription, huh? We hear that new X-Men cartoon is pretty good, so maybe we’ll actually get some value out of it this year.
Anyway, Deadpool and Wolverine will slice and dice its way to a theater near you on July 26. What’s the over-under on Channing Tatum showing up as Gambit? The dude’s suffered long enough; just let him have this. Hell, if Nic Cage can show up in The Flash, anything’s possible.