10. Patrice Wilson, “Beautiful” [ARK Music Factory]
This is just the most ridiculous piece of shit that I’ve seen in the past few years, and it was brought to my attention by r/WTF when it premiered a few months ago. Wilson, who’s best known as the sort-of creepy guy behind Rebecca Black’s “Friday” and the birthday dreams of other 14-year-old girls, has made his masterpiece with this utterly bizarre ode to giving birth and all of the multi-colored bodily fluids that come with it. Yeah, that’s right — at one point, Wilson dons a pair of protective eyewear to prevent an assortment of paints (representing god only knows what) from ruining his vision as they cover his face. Take a fucking bow, dude. You’ve won.