Smoke up and watch Snoop Dogg and Kate Upton parody ‘Just A Friend’ for a Hot Pockets music video


Wait, read that headline again. What? Dude. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Everyone knows that Hot Pockets are only tasty when you’re zooted out of your head dome on sweet green izm, but now apparently you need LSD to appreciate their commercials. Snoop Dogg (Lion? Calvin? Where we at?) and Kate Upton have come together to parody Biz Markie’s ’80s classic “Just A Friend,” all in the glorious name of Hot Pockets.

“You Got What I Eat,” dubbed as a Hot Pockets music video, was released this week and also features Oliver Cooper, Bow Wow & KevJumba (where’s Biz though?!!?). It’s a pretty trippy video, and while it doesn’t exactly give us the munchies (or the desire to scald the roof of our mouths), we do have Hot Pockets on our minds this afternoon. Anything can happen tonight when we stumble into the 24-hour Tedeschi’s in Allston at 3am.


Also, we gotta extend props also to the “Sky High Bakery” reference, joining Jack In The Box’s Munchie Meal commercial in late-night food campaigns that aren’t shying away from targeting that coveted stoner demographic (that’s not sarcasm).

Toke up to the video above, and read along to the lyrics below. Yes, Snoop counts out to the “Nothin’ But A G Thang” intro. Snoop doesn’t care what you think about that.

Hat tip to That Eric Alper


One, two, three to the heat
Stop counting sheep,
And move your feet to the beat
I bet you’re wonderin’
“Who are you?”
The baker who made new
HOT POCKETS come true
Now let me give you an introduction
To the Master Baker of this production
You know he bakes here
You know he bakes there
He be baking all day
I bake everywhere
Wanna bake with me?
Then come on in
We light up taste buds
From beginning to end
My buttery seasoning so hip
It drips
Tastes so good
Gotta lick your lips
Smell my savory garlic
but don’t disturb
The garden where I grow
flavor-fantastic-al herbs
…his flavor-fantastical herbs.

YOU… YOU Got What I Eeeeaaattt!
You say you’re just a baker
But you’re my HOT POCKETS maker

Oh baby, YOU… YOU Got
What I Eeeeaaattt!
You got the hot buttery crust
I need your hot buttery crust

Hold up, hold up
My friend’s gotta beef with you
Take a step back baker
The Butcher’s coming through
I see you like the crust
well I like it too
But without my premium meats
You got nothing to chew
See I’m the Master Butcher
And I bow down to zero
Online they call me
The 8-Bit hero
I fly cross the land
So my flocks are protected
Try to come for my beef
And ya gonna get rejected
Cuz if you step to me
Ya gonna get stuck
As your head takes a buck
From pepperoni nun-chucks
He’s got premium meats,
The cream of the crop
Welcome to my B.I.G.G.
Butcher’s shop…..ya heaarrdd

YOU… YOU Got What I Eeeeaaattt!
You make the Steak and Cheese
That brings me to my knees

Oh baby, YOU… YOU Got What I Eeeeaaattt!
The flavor is so sweet
You know how to spice that meat

Now I know the Butcher
Likes to take credit for the show
But there’s a reason that my bakery
Is rollin’ in the dough
Listen little baby
Don’t fall for the cuts
It’s the buttery crust
That makes you want it so much

Don’t listen to him, girl
He’s been baking too long
It’s my premium meats,
that make your lips sing a song
When that sauce heats up
The pepperonis do the rest
It’s exactly why my new
HOT POCKETS are the best

No no no… YOU, both Got What I Eeeeaaattt!
I love your buttery crust
But I love that meat just as much


Oh YOU… both Got What I Eeeeaaattt!
You got all my hot treats
You both make me complete